I Want Another Baby!

Now, I'll keep this short and sweet especially since I'm DOUBLY late with this blog post (I do apologize, but my laptop was not cooperating!)

So, after having my daughter I had decided I was NEVER having another child. People would always ask me, especially when Sapph was around two years old, when I'm giving Sapphyre a sibling and my response was always "one and DONE!".

This is because first of all, if you're a regular reader you would've read about how I had to get what felt like a MILLION stitches after giving birth to Sapphyre.

Followed by the stitches, I also got a yeast infection, which was no fun, so at that point I was done!

But, as Sapphyre got older and more independent I began to miss the days when she needed me. I mean before she turned four, Sapphyre was already dressing herself, brushing her teeth, and so on.

When she hit the age of 4, she was making peanut butter and bread (which she loves), picking out her own outfits, wiping her own butt (yay!) and just doing almost everything for herself, and I began feeling less and less needed.

So when I met Jacob, he and I had started talking about having a baby by the end of this year....then we broke up :(

I was really sad about that because we had a great connection, he was pretty awesome and I thought he'd make a great dad...but I guess God has different plans for me.

But, some days I really can't shake this bay fever and I had even thought of having a blatant conversation with the next man that comes into my life and say, "Look, I just want to have a baby, you can handle business and leave" (haha).

I mean I think I'm a great single mom and I realize that I am stuck in my ways about how I want to raise my children and so sometimes I think it's best I raise children alone.

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Something my pastor mentioned in church during the Christmas season really got me thinking. He was talking about Mary being a virgin and having a child. He noted that Mary was an unwed teenager when she got pregnant, but he also made sure to mention and highlight the fact that God still used her despite what people may say. But, when we look in today's society, there are so many people who look down upon single, unwed mothers, and honestly it's a shame.

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I know, you think I'm crazy for wanting to do it all over again alone. But, what you don't understand is that I have a pretty good hang of things, and as you can see my luck with men is not improving (lol), so it's either the natural way to procreate or I'll be heading to a sperm bank!

And I don't like when people say, "Oh, wait until God sends you a husband". My thing is, what if the man can't follow directions, then what?!